Self Talk and Positive Thinking.com

Anger is one way of expressing your frustration with your life and the world. Anger can be a valuable tool for self growth if you know how to use it. Self growth through anger can actually be some of the greatest lessons you’ll ever learn. It can signal that something is wrong and that you need to do something about it. If you take the time to actually examine your anger instead of just “feeling” angry, you’ll gain incredible insights into yourself. The problem is usually we’re too busy being angry at people or external events to learn the valuable lesson our emotion is trying to tell us. We’re blaming others for our feelings when really we should be looking inside.
Here’s two ways to enable self growth through anger in a positive way:
1. Why Are You Angry?
Ask yourself, “Why are you really feeling this way?” If your response is something like “because Joe didn’t pick up the dry cleaning like I asked him to” then you’re not looking deep enough. Blaming others is the superficial response. Even if you are mad at Joe, what bothers you the most about the situation?  What is it telling you about yourself, your needs, your wants, etc. You need to work through the emotion of anger as soon as you can. It’s your reaction you need to figure out. Dig deep and learn from that. You’ll be amazed at what you can discover about yourself.  I can give you a personal example. I went to a meeting once and I was verbally attacked over an application I supported at my work place. Various people went on and on about how terrible this system was and that it never worked. That didn’t bother me that much. I was used to that but one of the comments was, “your job is pointless”. This really upset me at the time. I was also absolutely furious with that comment. My immediate reaction was:
• How dare they say that?
• Didn’t they know how hard I worked?
• Didn’t they know how much overtime I’d been putting in lately?
I was so angry and upset that they would treat me that way. Once I took the time to think about what was really making me so mad, I learnt a lot. I realized that the comment was more true than I wanted to admit. In the big scheme of things, my job was pointless. It wasn’t what I really wanted to be doing with my life and this is what frustrated me the most. Here I was pouring part of my heart and soul into a job I didn’t even really want to do. I had convinced myself that I was important there. That I was making a difference. I wasn’t. I was using it as a crutch because I didn’t have the confidence in myself to take the scary road towards what I really wanted to do. As soon as I realized that, a lot of my anger just melted away. I also realized that I needed to start focusing on what I really wanted to do. I now consider this incident as a great gift. It got me back on track to moving in the direction I want to go with my life. I probably wouldn’t be where I am today if I hadn’t taken the time to figure out why I was really so angry.
2. Change Yourself, Not Others
The other thing to remember when feeling angry is that you can’t change other people. You can only change yourself and how you react to it. Once you figure out why you’re so angry, you then have a pretty good idea of what you need to change. You also have a better idea of what personal issues you need to work on. Feel unappreciated? Figure out why and how do you change your own feelings towards that? Mad at your spouse for burning the toast? Most likely that’s not what’s really bothering you. Usually, it’s a symptom, not the cause. Take control of the situation and change yourself. Your emotion has provided you with the clue, now figure it out. When Using the 2 Steps, Remember the Following:  A sure sign you’ve figured out the true cause of your anger is the moment when you feel the anger suddenly subside. In the above example, if I’d left my soul searching at the point where I was still angry at not being appreciated by my co-workers, I wouldn’t have been able to discover the real issue. I would have still been very frustrated and angry at the external situation. Annoyed with my co-workers when they were only a symptom, not the true cause. As soon as I understood what was really happening, all the anger disappeared. I also knew I needed to make changes and from understanding why I was mad I had a better idea of what I needed to do. My anger truly was a great gift for me. Until you figure out the real reason, the emotion will remain. It will be like when you have a thorn in your thumb. You may think you have it out but when you feel a prick every once in awhile, you know it’s still there. It’s not out until you deal with it. A sure sign that you haven’t dealt with the real reason is that you find that you get irritated very easily with everyone and everything. It will seem like everyone is just out to wreck your day. When you’re absolutely furious at something or someone, it can be hard to get yourself to start thinking about why it bothers you so much. The more you do it, the easier it gets though. And you feel a lot better afterwards because you have used it for personal self growth rather than letting it’s destructive side hurt you. You are able to move forward with your life because you have resolved the issue instead of just stuffing it down inside.  If you deny your true feelings, episodes of anger are going to occur again and again until you deal with it. Anger is also a negative emotion which takes a huge amount of energy. You may also find that your immune system is reduced if you’re holding on to a lot of anger. Use your energy for positive things and learn from your anger. Think of it as a gift you’re being given to learn about yourself and how to get the life you really want. You learn in life that the only person you can really correct and change is yourself. And sooner you do it  sooner you will be able to enjoy better and more peaceful life.

It was a long, tense boardroom meeting. The team from Finance wanted to scrap the whole project due to budget concerns while the Marketing group felt it would be worththe extra cost. Both sides raised valid points. In the end though, everyone was just frustrated. They had no idea how to move forward with this issue. It was beginning to look like the only answer was to ask a director to make the final decision. It was Suzanne from Marketing who suddenly made the brilliant comment of, “what is the end result we’re trying to achieve here?” And that is the answer to how to deal with frustrations.
Let me explain. Our initial reaction when hitting a setback or a “roadblock”, whether it be during an important project or even just trying to finish a task, is usually one of frustration or thoughts along the lines of:
• “Why does this always happen to me?”
• ”Why doesn’t anything ever work for me?”
• ”Well, I guess that’s the end of that idea. Back to the drawing board.”
It doesn’t have to be this way though. By simply changing how you view the situation you can dramatically alter the ending. So, how can those frustrating moments be
valuable? Here’s how:
Frustrations can indicate that you need to take a step back
You’ve heard of people not being able to see the trees for the forest, well you can get so caught up in wanting to accomplish a particular task that you forget the reason why you started in the first place. Stop and take a step back to look at the big picture. As Suzanne asked, “What is the end result you’re trying to achieve?” Take the time to re-affirm the original goal and see if you’re still on the right path. You may discover that you’ve somehow started down a road you never really intended to travel. It’s easy to get so caught up in dealing with the day to day issues that you don’t realize that you’re now way off course. Take the time to re-focus on exactly what it is that you want to accomplish and you may find that you’ve just saved yourself a lot of time, effort, and money on something you didn’t want to be involved with anyway.
Roadblocks can also be an excellent opportunity to brainstorm
Sometimes when a plan is created, all of the potential options aren’t considered. You just immediately think of a solution and go for it. When you run into a frustration, it could be
an excellent opportunity to brainstorm. You may discover far more efficient or cost effective opportunities available just by taking the time to do some research. Here’s an example: say you decide to publish a “How To” book. You get it all set up and then find out that the printing costs are just too high. You could give up on the idea or you could brainstorm.
During a brainstorming session, you could consider:
• could you create an ebook instead which would save the printed production costs?
• could you print and bind it yourself with the tools that are now available for just
this purpose?
• could you alter certain areas to make it cheaper (ie. use less colour photos, use
only 2 colours, etc.)?
• is there a technical college available which may be willing to do the work cheaper
as a learning tool for their students?
• would it be more effective as a web site?
The benefit of brainstorming is that you may discover a far better idea than the original plan. You may end up really glad that you didn’t go with the original direction.
Problems can be a sign that you need a break
Your first reaction when running into a roadblock may be that you absolutely have to solve the issue no matter what. Just like whenever Superman saw some dastardly deed being done, he had to rush in to save the day. The problem with this is that you become focused on the feeling that the problem must be solved right now. It’s how people start to make huge mountains out of anthills. It can also cause you such stress that you just can’t come up with the answer. If you can take a break and come back to look at the situation from a fresh viewpoint, you may find that the issue wasn’t really as big of a deal as you initially thought. Also, after you’ve had a chance to re-charge your batteries and regain your enthusiasm, the roadblocks may just disappear on their own with a solution suddenly seeming so very obvious. You just couldn’t see it before because you were only concentrating on solving an issue that felt huge at the time when it really wasn’t.
If you can think of your frustrations as opportunities then you will be far ahead of those that simply give up whenever problems occur. Think of roadblocks as “silver linings” for your goals and you’ll be amazed at what solutions suddenly appear. Your confidence to achieve your ultimate desires will increase as you now know you have incredible power. Your goals may suddenly become much closer than you thought and be even greater achievements and all because you knew frustrations are really valuable tools. You just needed to know how to use them.

A reporter was sent to a stone cutter to interview three different men doing exactly the same job – hammering stones. Asking about how they liked their job, the first one answers, “I really hate it. I barely make the money to survive. I am doing the same stupid thing over and over. My back hurts, I am getting old, and I absolutely see no sense in what I am doing.”  The second man responds to the same question, saying, “It’s not bad, I have a decent house and a nice car. I love my family; however, I am not fulfilled with what I am doing.”  The third man replies, “I love my job. I am absolutely thrilled and I appreciate everyday I can be here. I think my work is wonderful as all these stones I am hammering will later be part of the material to build a wonderful cathedral. A place where many people can worship God and a place where many people will find the strength to overcome struggles and difficulties in their lives. I cannot imagine doing something different – I feel happy every moment.”  Remember – all these people are doing the same exact work. It is only their attitude that makes a completely different person out of them. Not only are these people all different, they each will be affecting the other people around them by their attitudes.
It’s the basic principle of looking at a half full or half empty glass. It is your viewpoint of life that determines you attitude. If you think everything has to be given to you for free, you are setting yourself up for big disappointment. You will spend a lot of time being angry because you’ll soon discover that nothing comes to you for free. Focusing on who you are and what you have will shift your attitude and make you more humble. Recognize what you do have in life. Go out in nature and recognize the beauty of life. Pick a flower, watch and feel the grace of it.

How do you develop a new habit? Over the years, a simple, powerful, proven methodology has been determined for new habit development. It is very much like a recipe for preparing a dish in the kitchen. You can use it to develop any habit that you desire. Over time, you will find it easier and easier to develop the habits that you want to incorporate into your personality.

First, make a decision. Decide clearly that you are going to begin acting in a specific way 100% of the time, whenever that that behavior is required. For example, if you decide to arise early and exercise each morning, set your clock for a specific time, and when the alarm goes off, immediately get up, put on your exercise clothes and begin your exercise session.

Second, never allow an exception to your new habit pattern during the formative stages. Don’t make excuses or rationalizations. Don’t let yourself off the hook. If you resolve to get up at 6:00 am each morning, discipline yourself to get up at 6:00 AM, every single morning until this becomes automatic.

Third, tell others that you are going to begin practicing a particular behavior. It is amazing how much more disciplined and determined you will become when you know that others are watching you to see if you have the willpower to follow through on your resolution.

Fourth, visualize yourself performing or behaving in a particular way in a particular situation. The more often you visualize and imagine yourself acting as if you already had the new habit, the more rapidly this new behavior will be accepted by your subconscious mind and become automatic.

Fifth, create an affirmation that you repeat over and over to yourself. This repetition dramatically increases the speed at which you develop the new habit. For example, you can say something like; “I get up and get going immediately at 6:00 AM each morning!” Repeat these words the last thing before you fall asleep. In most cases, you will automatically wake up minutes before the alarm clock goes off, and soon you will need no alarm clock at all.

Sixth, resolve to persist in the new behavior until it is so automatic and easy that you actually feel uncomfortable when you do not do what you have decided to do.

Seventh, and most important, give yourself a reward of some kind for practicing in the new behavior. Each time you reward yourself, you reaffirm and reinforce the behavior. Soon you begin to associate, at an unconscious level, the pleasure of the reward with the behavior. You set up your own force field of positive consequences that you unconsciously look forward to as the result of engaging in the behavior or habit that you have decided upon.

So,why not to start to develop a new habit today? Because if you think where you are today,what you will find that your habits of doing things brought you there where you are now. And the reason why I’m saying that- you would not read this article unless you want to develop a new habit. And you need to understand,that your habits control your life,so if you don’t like something about your life-DEVELOP A NEW HABIT. Good luck,and never forget ” The Best Is Jet To Come”

Aristotle said that the ultimate aim or purpose or human life is to achieve your own happiness. You are the very happiest when what you are doing on the outside is congruent with your values on the inside. When you are living in complete alignment with that which you consider to be good, right, and true, you will automatically feel happy and positive about yourself and your world.

Know What You Really Want
Stephen Covey once said, “Be sure that, as you scramble up the ladder of success, it is leaning against the right building.” Many people work hard to achieve goals that they think they want only to find, at the end of the day, they get no joy or satisfaction from their accomplishments. They ask, “Is this all there is?” This occurs when the outer accomplishment is not in harmony with your inner values. Don’t let this happen to you.

Trust Your Intuition
Self-trust is the foundation of greatness. Self-trust comes from listening to your intuition, to your “still, small voice” within. Men and women begin to become great when they begin to listen to their inner voices and absolutely trust that they are being guided to a higher power each step of the way. Living in alignment with your true values is the royal road to self-confidence, self-respect, and personal pride. In fact, almost every human problem can be resolved by returning to values.

Watch Your Behavior
How can you tell what your values really are? The answer is simple. You always demonstrate your true values in your actions and especially your actions under pressure. Whenever you are forced to choose between one behavior and another you will always act consistent with what is most important and valuable to you at that moment. Values, in fact, are organized in a hierarchy. You have a series of values, some of them very intense and important and some of them weaker and less important. One of the most important exercises you can engage in to determine who you really are and what you really want is to organize your values by priority. Once you are clear about the relative important of your values, you can then organize your outer life so that it is in alignment with them.

Determine Your Hearts Desire
The spiritual teacher Emmet Fox wrote about the importance of discovering your “hearts desire.” What is your hearts desire? As a friend of mine asks, “What do you want to be famous for?” What words would you like people to use to describe you when you are not there? What would you like someone to say about you at your funeral? What kind of reputation do you have today? What kind of reputation would you like to have sometime in the future?

Your Past is Not Your Future
Many people had difficult experiences growing up. They fell on hard times and became associated with the wrong people. Some were convicted and sent to prison for crimes. But at a certain point in life, they decided to change. They thought seriously about what kind of person they wanted to be known as, and thought of, in the future. They decided to change their lives by changing the values that they lived by. By making these decisions and sticking to them, they changed their lives. Remember, it doesn’t matter where you’re coming from; all that really matters is where you’re going.

There are four  mental laws that you need to know and work with in order to fulfill your complete potential. The first of these is the Law of Habit. This law says that, whatever you do repeatedly eventually becomes a new habit. In its simplest terms, this means that you can develop any habit of thought or action that you desire, if you will just repeat it often enough and long enough. The second law that you must know and use is the Law of Emotion. This law says that, every action that you take is stimulated by an emotion of some kind, either positive or negative. You can think of emotions the way you would think of a campfire. In order for the campfire to continue burning, you must continue to put wood on the fire. If you stop putting fuel on the fire for any period of time, the fire will eventually go out. The things that you think about most of the time are very much like logs on the fire. If you think about what you want, and how to get it, most of the time, more and more of your mental abilities will be focused on achieving the goals that you have set for yourself. But since your amount of thinking time is limited, when you discipline yourself to think only about what you want, you stop putting wood on the fire of your negative emotions. As a result, you begin to eliminate the doubts and fears that hold most people back. Concentrate on what you want and this brings you to the Law of Concentration. This law says that,whatever you dwell upon, grows and expands in your life.
In other words, whatever you think about most of the time, increases. More and more of your emotions and mental energies become focused and concentrated on what you are dwelling upon. The more you think about your goals and how to accomplish them, the faster you will move toward them. You will focus more of your emotional energy on them, and you will have less energy available for the problems, worries and concerns that preoccupy most people.

The final law is the Law of Subconscious activity. This law says that,your subconscious mind accepts any thought, plan or goal created by the conscious mind, and then organizes your thoughts and behaviors to bring that goal into reality. Whatever thoughts or goals you repeat over and over again in your conscious mind are eventually accepted by your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind then goes to work, 24 hours a day, to coordinate your thoughts, words and actions to bring those goals into your life. One Thought At A Time Your conscious mind can only hold one thought at a time, either positive or negative. You may be capable of thinking hundreds of thoughts in a row, but you can only think of one thought at a time. And you are always free to choose that thought. An essential success habit is the habit of keeping your mind focused clearly on the person you want to be, the goals you want to achieve, and the steps that you will have to take to achieve those goals.

When you make a habit of thinking and talking most of the time about where you are going and how to get there, you take complete control of the development of your self-concept and your personality. You step on the accelerator of your own potential. You move yourself onto the fast track in your life. You begin to move ahead at a speed that will amaze you, and everyone around you. So,never forget thoughts become things,and the thoughts  you chose to dwell up on,it determines what kind of future you are going to create.  And remember The Best is Jet To Come! Have A Great Day !

As you grow older, you become increasingly sensitive to the approval or disapproval of others, starting with members of your family, and then your friends and associates. Teenagers especially become extremely sensitive to whether or not they are liked or disliked by their peers. Instead of being fearless and spontaneous,completely open, honest and expressive, they begin to shape their behaviors and conform to whatever they feel their peers will approve of at the moment. The child does not know why the parent is behaving this way. The child simply
concludes that, “Every time I do something that Mommy or Daddy disapproves of,they stop loving me. Therefore, whatever it is, I have to do what makes them happy. I have to do what pleases them. I have to do what they want if I want to be safe.” This feeling generates what is called the “compulsive negative habit pattern,” which is characterized by the words “I have to!” As an adult, the child who was subjected to disapproval and destructive criticism becomes hypersensitive to the attitudes and opinions of others. They are continually saying, “I have to do this” or “I have to do that.” When the fear of rejection becomes extreme, the individual becomes so hypersensitive to the opinions of others that he or she cannot make a decision until he or she is absolutely convinced that everyone in the world around them will approve and support the decision.
The worst situation of all, which is quite common in most people, is the combined feeling of, “I have to” but “I can’t.” The individual feels that he has to do something in order to win the approval of an important person in his life, but simultaneously, he is afraid of trying anything new or different, and becomes extremely sensitive to the reactions and comments of anyone around him. The root cause of negative habit patterns can almost always be traced back to “destructive criticism” in early childhood. Often, destructive criticism is accompanied by physical punishment. In either or both cases, the child very quickly loses his or her natural spontaneity and becomes fearful and hypersensitive to others. All the other fears that hold people back – the fears of loss, of poverty, of embarrassment, of ridicule, of ill health, of the loss of love of someone, of public speaking, of taking a chance, of starting or trying something new or different – are all rooted in the fears of failure and rejection that begin in early childhood. One of the greatest discoveries in the development of the peak performance personality is that your fears and your level of self-esteem have an inverse or opposite relationship. In other words, the more you like yourself, the less you fear failure and rejection. The higher your levels of self-esteem, the lower are the fears and doubts that hold most people back. The more you like and value yourself, the more willing you are to take risks and to endure the inevitable setbacks, obstacles and temporary failures that will occur. The more you like yourself, the less concerned you are with the approval or disapproval of other people. You go your own way. The very fastest way to build your self-esteem and self-confidence, and to neutralize the fears that may be holding you back, is to repeat continually the words “I like myself!” Whenever you feel doubtful or uneasy, begin repeating these words to yourself, “I like myself! I like myself! I like myself!” The most important habit you can develop is the habit of deliberately building your own self-esteem and self-confidence on a daily basis. The more you feed your mind with positive words, pictures, and thoughts, the more positive, confident, optimistic and unafraid you become. The more you like yourself, the better you do at anything you attempt. The more you like yourself, the less you fear failure and rejection. The more you like yourself, the less you worry about short-term setbacks and obstacles. The more you like yourself, the greater courage and resilience you will have to face the inevitable ups and downs of life. And the more you like yourself, the more it is that you will persist until you succeed. Self-esteem is everything. And  remember, as I always say “The Best Is Jet To Come!”  Have A Great Day.

When you are born, you come into the world with two natural qualities. First, you are completely unafraid. You are totally fearless. You have no reason to be afraid because you have had no experiences to make you afraid. The second natural quality that you are born with is that you are completely spontaneous. You laugh,cry, pee, poop, sleep and express yourself with no thought or concern about whether anybody approves or disapproves. These are your natural qualities in a state of nature. As an adult, when you feel completely relaxed and safe, surrounded by people whom you like and trust, your natural tendency is to revert to being completely open and unafraid, spontaneous and expressive. This is the ideal condition of the completely happy, fully functioning adult. Starting early in childhood, as the result of the things your parents do and say, you begin to learn the two basic negative habit patterns that then become the most destructive influences in your life as an adult.
The first negative habit pattern that you learn is called the inhibitive negative habit pattern. This is what soon becomes the fear of failure, risk and loss. As a child, your natural urge is to explore your environment. You eagerly reach out to touch,taste, feel and experiment with everything around you. But often your parents react and even over react to this behavior by discouraging you as much as possible. They say, “No! Get away from that! Don’t touch that! Leave that alone!” Many parents reinforce their words and threats with spankings and punishment. Children need love like roses need rain. Love is as important to the developing child as is food. Any interruption of the flow of unconditional love to the child causes the child to feel nervous and frightened. Psychologists say that virtually all adult problems are rooted in the phenomena of “love withheld” in early childhood. When your parents become angry with you as the result of your natural desire and drive to explore your world and your environment, you have no way of understanding that this is because of their fear for your safety. Instead, as a child,you merely react and respond with the idea that, “Every time I try or touch or taste something new or different, my mother or father gets angry at me. It must be because I am incapable and incompetent. It must be because I am no good. It must be because I can’t do it.” Fear of Trying Anything New This feeling of “I can’t” begins the development of the fear of failure. If you are discouraged or punished too often as a child, very early in life you will become fearful of trying new things. This fear will then carry over into later childhood,adolescence and adult life. Thereafter, whenever you think of doing something new or different, something that entails risk or uncertainty, your first reaction will be “I can’t!”

As soon as you say the words “I can’t” to yourself, you will begin immediately to think of all the reasons why such a thing is not possible for you. You will think and talk in terms of failure, rather than success. You will think of the uncertainties and all the possible risks of loss that may occur. Before you even try something new, you will talk yourself out of it. Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, once asked an audience, “What is the average number of times that a person tries to achieve a new goal before they give up?” After several guesses from the audience, he gave the answer. “Less than one.”
The point he made was that most people give up before they try the first time. They give up without even trying once. Even though they want to improve their lives,increase their incomes, and accomplish more than they are today, as soon as the new goal pops into their mind, they automatically respond with the words “I can’t!” And begin thinking of all the reasons why it is not possible for them. The most important habit you can develop for great happiness and success is the habit of repeating to yourself and believing, “I can do anything I put my mind to!” The most powerful words that you can repeat, over and over, to neutralize and overcome the fear of failure, are the words, “I can do it! I can do it!”
The kindest words that a parent can tell his or her child, in addition to the words “I love you,” are the words “You can do anything that you set your mind to.” It is amazing how many people’s lives have been dramatically affected by the influence of a single person, a parent, relative or friend, who simply told them, over and over again, “You can do it.” So,why not to give your best shot to whatever idea you’ve got,do something about it while you can,and don’t think that you can’t do it. Good Luck! And remember “The Best Is Jet To come!”

The Law of Belief. This is the basic principle that underlies most religion, psychology, philosophy and metaphysics. The Law of Belief says that, “Whatever you believe, with conviction, becomes your reality.” In the New Testament it says, “According to your faith, it is done unto you.” In the Old Testament, it says, “As a man thinketh, in his heart (his beliefs), so is he.” William James of Harvard wrote, “Belief creates the actual fact.” The fact is that, “You do not believe what you see, but rather, you see what you already believe.” Your deeply held beliefs form a screen of prejudices that distort your external reality and cause you to see things not the way they are, but the way you are.
The worst of all beliefs are self-limiting beliefs. These are beliefs that you have developed through life, usually false, that cause you to believe that you are limited in some way. Your negative beliefs soon become habitual ways of thinking. You may believe that you lack intelligence, creativity, personality, the ability to speak publicly, the ability to earn a high income, the ability to lose weight, or the ability to achieve your goals. As a result of your self-limiting beliefs, you continually “sell yourself short,” give up easily in the pursuit of a goal, and even worse, tell other people around you that you lack certain qualities or abilities. Your beliefs then become your realities. “You are not what you think you are, but what you think,you are.”
In developing your habits, one of the most important steps you take is to challenge your self-limiting beliefs. You begin this process by imagining that you have no limitations at all. When you develop your mind to the point where you absolutely believe that you can do anything you put your mind to, you will find a way to make that belief a reality. As a result, your whole life will change.  Beliefs are the hardest things of all to change. But there is good news. It is that all beliefs are learned. And anything that has been learned can be unlearned. You can develop the beliefs of courage, confidence and unstoppable persistence that you need for great success by reprogramming your subconscious mind in a specific way.

There are four simple steps which lead to the habit of persistence. You don’t have to be a genius, or to have particular amount of education, the only thing you need- little time and effort. The four necessary steps for developing persistence are:—

1. You’ve got to know want you want in life,in other words,find purpose for your life. For example,if I say Mike Tyson-your will say he is a boxer,if I say Michael Jordan-you’ll say he is a basketballer,if I say for instance your name- what other people would say about you,cause that is a clue what your mission in life is.Other people see something what you may not see.I know that many people struggling with defining what they really would like to do for the rest of there life. It’s very important to know what you really want to do and which direction to go in life. Here is another clue,what comes naturally out of your mouth when you meet with your friends,on which subject you like to talk,make research,to hear about most. What moves you and gets your full attention. I’ll give another example,my friend is pastor and he’s been in that position for about 12 years,and he is struggling ,even though he is doing his best,and he is PERSISTANT in learning no matter what other people think about him,I know that many times he was asking himself,should he stay or leave that position,and he knows what other people think about him being in that position too,that he is not called to be a pastor,BUT when it needs doing administrative job he has no rivals,he is good at that,he is flying if you like,he is creative,enthusiastic energetic,cause he feels confurtable in that position. Another thing that will help you- what is your strongest side,what is your dominating gift,where you most creative and enthusiastic all that are indicators to point you to the right direction. Remember,when you decide what you wanna do in life it must be backed by burning desire for its fullfilment . You will never be persistent in anything what you don’t like doing.

2.An exact plan,expressed in continuous action.

3. A mind closed tightly against all negative and discouraging influences, including negative suggestions of relatives, friends and family…..

4. A friendly connection with one or more persons who will encourage you to follow through with both plan and purpose. These four steps are essential for success in all walks of life. The entire purpose of these four steps is to enable you to take these four steps as a matter of habit. These are the steps by which you will control your economic destiny. These are the steps that lead to freedom and independence of thought. These are the steps that lead to riches, power, fame, and worldly recognition. These are the four steps which guarantee favorable “breaks.” These are the steps that convert dreams into physical realities,and also lead to the mastery of fear,discouragement, indifference. There is a magnificent reward for all who learn to take these four steps. What mystical power gives to men of persistence the capacity to master difficulties? Does the quality of persistence set up in your mind some form of spiritual, mental or chemical activity which gives you access to supernatural forces? Does God (Infinite Intelligence) throw itself on the side of the person who still fights on,after the battle has been lost, with the whole world on the opposing side? If you make an impartial study of the prophets, philosophers,”miracle” men, and religious leaders of the past, they’ve been drawn to the inevitable conclusion that persistence, concentration of effort,and definiteness of purpose , were the major sources of their achievements. And remember as I always say “The Best Is Jet To Come” Don’t Forget! Have A Great Day.

The majority of men never learn that the urge of sex has other possibilities, which far transcend in importance, that of mere physical expression. The desire for sexual expression is by far the strongest and most impelling of all the human emotions, and for this very reason this desire, when harnessed and transmuted into action, other than that of physical expression, may raise you to the status of a genius. It is a fact well known to psychologists that there is a very close relationship between sex desires and spiritual urges—a fact which accounts for the peculiar behavior of people who participate in the gatherings  known as religious “revivals,”.The world is ruled, and the destiny of civilization is established,by the human emotions. People are influenced in their actions, not by reason so much as by “feelings.”There are other mind stimulants, but no one of them, nor all of them combined, can equal the driving power of sex. There is the factor of personality known as “personal magnetism” is nothing more nor less than sex energy. Highly sexed people always have a plentiful supply of magnetism. Through cultivation and understanding,this vital force may be drawn upon and used to great advantage in the relationships between people. This energy may be communicated to others through :
1. The hand-shake. The touch of the hand indicates, instantly, the presence of magnetism, or the lack of it.
2. The tone of voice. Magnetism, or sex energy, is the factor with which the voice may be colored, or made musical and charming.
3. Posture and carriage of the body. Highly sexed people move briskly, and with grace and ease.
4. The vibrations of thought. Highly sexed people mix the emotion of sex with their thoughts, or may do so at will, and in that way, may influence those around them.
5. Body adornment. People who are highly sexed are usually very careful about their personal appearance. They usually select clothing of a style becoming to their personality, physique, complexion,etc.
When employing salesmen, the more capable sales manager looks for the quality of personal magnetism as the first requirement of a salesman. People who lack sex energy will never become enthusiastic nor inspire others with enthusiasm, and enthusiasm is one of the most important requisites in salesmanship, no matter what one is selling. The public speaker, orator, preacher, lawyer, or salesman who is lacking in sex energy is a “flop,” as far as being able to influence others is concerned. Couple with this the fact, that most people can be influenced only through an appeal to their emotions, and you will understand the importance of sex energy as a part of the salesman’s native ability. Master salesmen attain the status of mastery in selling, because they, either consciously, or unconsciously,transmute the energy of sex into sales enthusiasm!
The salesman,or any other human being who knows how to take there mind off the subject of sex, and direct it into anything that they put there focus on ,with as much enthusiasm and
determination as they would apply to its original purpose, has acquired the art of sex transmutation, whether they know it or not,and once you learn how to do that,your life will never be the same.

We often have the perception that self-growth will be simple, enjoyable, and rewarding. It certainly can be, but there is also another aspect of the self-growth journey that is rarely mentioned. And that is, when everything falls apart.So, how do we deal with the pain and fear when everything falls apart? Our first reaction might be to run away to avoid feeling the pain. Another reaction might be to try and put everything back the way it was before it fell apart. But doing so only delays the process. Remember that the destruction is necessary in order to make room for the rebuilding of something better
When everything falls apart, pay special attention to the exact circumstances that have begun deteriorating. This gives you a big clue about the biggest lies (limiting beliefs you have formed) about yourself, and your life. Look for the connection between the blockages you are dissolving, and the circumstances that are coming apart at the seams. For example, if you have begun exploring your true talents and abilities, and then you suddenly lose your job, a little introspection may help you to realize that your job didn’t allow you to use those talents and abilities, so it needed to be removed to make way for a more fulfilling career. Sometimes the connections can be a little more vague and you may have to dig a little deeper. It may take some time to fully understand how everything is related, but if you keep at it, you will come to understand it and you can then use that knowledge to rebuild something better.This isn’t an easy process by any means. But it is oh so fulfilling and exhilarating if we embrace it and allow it to happen without fighting against the pain and fear. Through our trials and challenges come new levels of growth, wisdom, and inner strength beyond our wildest dreams. We just need to stay with the process and watch for the rainbows after the storm. So,self- growth is not escapism; and real knowledge is not in big words and philosophies; real knowledge is a daily experience of life. As James Allen observed “it is a common error to suppose that the Higher Life is a matter of reading and the adoption of theology or metaphysical hypothesis and that spiritual principles can be understood by this method. The Higher Life is a higher living in thought, word and deed, and the knowledge of these spiritual principles which are imminent in man and in the universe can only be acquired after long discipline in the pursuit and practice of virtue.” True philosophy is one that crystallizes in deed and in a truly mastered life; every other commitment is vain and only serves to deceive the simple.
There is no justification in seeking after the “higher truth” when you despise and therefore not apply yourself to the truth you currently know. There is a sense in which truth is synthetic; a mind that cannot comprehend the simple wisdom of life is incapable of handling the deeper mysteries of destiny. As they say, it is only when the student is ready that the master appears; it is only when you prove yourself worthy in the ordinary obligations of life that you will be given charge over the great responsibilities that await disciplined and virtuous souls.

I invite you to conduct a growth commitment self test; how long have you been on this journey of growth and awareness? What is your true motivation on this journey? What are some of the things you have learned along the way? How many of these things are you practicing in your life right now?

You see, you will not be able to get the “big” revelations if you neglect the simple wisdom of everyday life. You cannot be entrusted with the riches of heaven if you prove unfaithful with the possessions of mortality; there is only one way from childhood to adulthood – it is the way of growth. The urgent call for you is this: do the Word. The wisdom of life is in thought, word and deed; nothing less. When duty calls, do not be found wanting; be counted among those worthy to stay the course and obtain the treasures of heaven.

In the final analysis, if you discover your True Calling in Life, and Choose to Follow your Passion – Realistically, you may not be in the ranks of the Rich and Famous. So, what is more important in the long run – Money, Status, Security, Comfort, or fulfilling yourself through following your True Passion?

We all have a choice; one can live his life and not question his existence, or choose to examine his life. We do not have to seek out our own mission and purpose, nor live our lives True to our own Hearts.

But, an important question to ask ourselves is this – If we do not Aspire to be all we were put on this earth to be, will we have truly lived our lives in the best possible way? At the end of our lives, will we feel we have lived our lives to the fullest? Will we be satisfied with our accomplishments and what we contributed to the planet, and be a willing participant transitioning to the Great Beyond?

In other words, if you finally feel that you have fulfilled your purpose here, what more is there to do, but leave this earth when you are called upon to do so? When it is your time to pass away, will you have done everything you wanted to do with your life?

We only get one chance at living. We only have one chance to do our lives right. That is it. This is the reason why you should put your heart into all you do, and to make certain you choose to do only those things you have the passion for. While you are still alive, you have the chance to complete your life on earth. Do it with all your heart, so there will be no regrets. Find your Dreams, and then pursue them – This may be the only thing you do that you will not regret.

Love, Romance, and Sex are all emotions capable of driving men to heights of super achievement. Love is the emotion which serves as a safety valve, and insures balance, poise, and
constructive effort. When combined, these three emotions may lift you to an altitude of a genius. Memories of love never pass. They linger, guide, and influence long after the source of stimulation has faded. There is nothing new in this. Every person, who has been moved by genuine love,knows that it leaves enduring traces upon the human heart. The effect of love endures, because love is spiritual in nature. The man is stimulated to great heights of achievement by love. Even the memories of love are sufficient to lift one to a higher plane of creative effort. The major force of love may spend itself and pass away, like a fire which has burned itself out, but it leaves behind indelible marks as evidence that it passed that way. Its
departure often prepares the human heart for a still greater love. Go back into your yesterdays, at times, and bathe your mind in the beautiful memories of past love. It will soften the influence of the present worries and annoyances. It will give you a source of escape from the unpleasant realities of life, and maybe who knows?—your mind will yield to you, during this temporary retreat into the world of fantasy, ideas, or plans which may change the entire financial or spiritual status of your life.
If you believe yourself unfortunate, because you have “loved and lost,” perish the thought. One who has loved truly, can never lose entirely. Love is whimsical and temperamental. Its nature is ephemeral, and transitory. It comes when it pleases, and goes away without warning. Accept and enjoy it while it remains, but spend no time worrying about its departure. Worry will never bring it back. Dismiss, also, the thought that love never comes but once. Love may come and go, times without number, but there are no two love experiences which affect you in just the same way. There may be,and there usually is, one love experience which leaves a deeper imprint on the heart than all the others, but all love experiences are beneficial, except to the person who becomes resentful and cynical when love makes its departure. There should be no disappointment over love, and there would be none if people understood the difference between the emotions of love and sex. The major difference is that love is spiritual, while sex is biological. No experience, which touches the human heart with a spiritual force, can possibly be harmful, except through ignorance,or jealousy.
Love is, without question, life’s greatest experience. It brings you into communion with God or Infinite Intelligence if you like. When mixed with the emotions of romance and sex, it may lead one far up the ladder of creative effort. The emotions of love, sex, and romance, are sides of the eternal triangle of achievement-building genius. Nature creates genii through no other force. Love is an emotion with many sides, shades, and colors. The love which you feel for parents, or children is quite different from that which you feel for your sweetheart. The one is mixed with the emotion of sex, while the other is not. The love which one feels in true friendship is not the same as that felt for your sweetheart, parents, or children, but it, too, is a
form of love. But the most intense and burning of all these various kinds of love, is that experienced in the blending of the emotions of love and sex. Marriages, not blessed with the eternal affinity of love, properly balanced and proportioned, with sex, cannot be happy ones—and seldom endure. Love, alone, will not bring happiness in marriage, nor will sex alone. When these two beautiful emotions are blended, marriage may bring about a state of mind, closest to the spiritual that you may ever know on this earthly plane.
When the emotion of romance is added to those of love and sex,the OBSTRUCTIONS  between the finite mind of man and God (Infinite Intelligence) are removed.
Then a genius has been born!

The majority of people permit relatives, friends, and the public at large to so influence them that they cannot live their own lives,because they fear criticism. Many people make mistakes in marriage,job, stand by the bargain, and go through life miserable and unhappy, because they fear criticism which may follow if they correct the mistake. Anyone who has submitted to this form of fear knows the irreparable damage it does, by destroying ambition, self-believe,and the desire to achieve. People refuse to take chances in business, because they fear the criticism which may follow if they fail. The fear of criticism, in such cases is stronger than the desire for success. Too many people refuse to set high goals for themselves, or even neglect selecting a career, because they fear the criticism of relatives and “friends” who may say “Don’t aim so high, people will think you are crazy. I remember when I first time have mentioned to my girlfriend that I want to start an Internet business,you’ll not believe instead of getting some kind of support,she has started to worn me about the danger,and in some way to try to protect me from such crazy idea . My other friends would make jokes out of me,when I was sharing my dream about having Internet business,they even would not stay and listen to me for more then 3 minutes. When I was sharing about my dream I could read in there faces what they have tried to say that I’m crazy,that I haven’t got enough brains to do it. Even though I haven’t got a clue about Internet and computers,my knowledge is almost big Zero. It seemed as if the whole world had suddenly turned its attention to me with the purpose of ridiculing me into giving up all desire to achieve my dream . But even that can’t stop me from reaching my goal,I haven’t got almost anybody who would believe in me and I don’t care to be honest who believes in me and who doesn’t,cause I believe in myself and I know that nothing will stop me,temporary setbacks,opposition,anything from reaching my dream. Because I have burning desire within me to be financially free and to do things that I love most,secondly I know exactly what I want to achieve ,thirdly I make every day actions toward my dream and I know sooner o later I will reach my destination. The FEAR OF CRITICISM is at the bottom of the destruction of most ideas which never reach the planning and action stage. Many people believe that material success is the result of favorable “breaks.” There is an element of ground for the belief, but those depending entirely upon luck, are nearly always disappointed,because they overlook another important factor which must be present before you can be sure of success. It is the knowledge with which favorable breaks can be made to order. Read those stories and imagine what burning desire,definite plane of action,persistence did for those people,and imagine what it can do for you. During the depression, W. C. Fields, the comedian, lost all his money, and found himself without income, without a job, and his means of earning a living no longer existed. Moreover,he was past sixty, when many men consider themselves old. He was so determined to stage a comeback that he offered to work without pay, in a new field (movies). In addition to his other troubles, he fell and injured his neck. To many that would have been the place to give up and quit. But Fields was persistent. He knew that if he carried on he would get the breaks sooner or later, and he did get them, but not by chance. Marie Dressler found herself down and out, with her money gone, with no job, when she was about sixty. She, too, went after the breaks, and got them. Her persistence brought an astounding triumph late in life, long beyond the age when most men and women are done with ambition to achieve. Eddie Cantor lost his money in the 1929 stock crash, but he still had his PERSISTENCE and his courage. With these, plus two prominent eyes, he exploited himself back into an income of $10,000 a week! Verily, if you have persistence, you can get along very well without many other qualities. The only “break” anyone can afford to rely upon is a self-made “break.” These come through persistence. The starting point is definiteness of purpose. Examine the first fifty people you meet, ask them what they want most in life, and forty eight of them will not be able to tell you. If you press them for an answer, some will say security, many will say money, a few will say happiness,others will say fame and power and so on …, but none of them will be able to define these terms, or give the slightest indication of a plan by which they hope to attain these expressed wishes. Riches do not respond to wishes. They respond only to definite plans, backed by definite desires, through constant persistence. I hope that you have learned something from this article that will help you in the future to fight this FEAR OF CRITICISM .  And remember The Best Is Jet To Come!  Have A Great Day!

If you have a dream, set your goal to achieve it. With all the enthusiasm in you but without a goal, you will only end up hitting against a wall. Set your goal very clearly and set the time as in when you are going to achieve it, then you are all well prepared to set out the journey to achieving your dream.

It takes you some effort, time and great self improvement personalities to achieve your dream. Don’t ever hope that you may one day be attaining overnight success. It will only happen if you are talking about lottery but I suppose we shouldn’t define that as being successful. There are indeed many areas where self improvement is concern and I cannot be possibly mentioning each and every one of them here or this article will become a book. So, start to explore through the world of self improvement so as to increase your speed towards achieving your goals in life.

Inspiring moments are very helpful too and it could enliven you more and move on to pursue and foresee more personal goals. As you pursue and reach every small goal, you can see positive and better changes in you and the succeeding set of goals become more and more challenging. You would begin to look forward to it and personal empowerment would form a life you truly desire and always dreamed about. Every personal growth would heighten and intensify your sense of power and ideas, and ambition are no longer out of reach.
With great positive mindset, you should develop that self-motivation in you so that your energy will not run out. Are you waking up every morning feeling excited and can’t wait to start your day? Or are you someone who has to force yourself up and drag yourself to work? Yes, that is one difference between a person with self-motivation and a person without any. When you have the motivation, you will develop that passion in you to get you job done. You will not be focusing on the tons of “work” waiting for you to complete, but you will be concentrating on the end results that you will bring about. You’ve got to maintain your positive mindset and stay positive in facing all challenges in life and believe in yourself that you can do it. Everyone has problems and this is a fact. The only difference is how you view them and how you are going to deal with them. A person who sees problems positively is actually having a higher chance to solve his or her problems more easily as he or she doesn’t waste the precious time in worrying and complaining.

Always bear in mind to keep pushing yourself and think positive at all times, as they can be so empowering. Get rid of the negative vibrations and feelings. It will take time, yet try to make it a routine to think more on a positive note. Turning negative into something optimistic is a good distinctive feature and never, ever giving up as endurance and perseverance and patient and tolerant in overcoming the many barriers and hindrances, and always looking forward is truly important to empower yourself. To create something out of your own life, there are myriad of ways out there but each begins with a small step.

To begin empowering yourself, you have to do things which truly interest you and along the way, you would be the person ever you will hold in high regard. Don’t stop empowering yourself because your personal empowerment and growth as a person will bring about self worth and positive image and it will help you to enjoy your  life in all it’s fullness.